ENTOMBED..

The past is important, there is no denying it. But history is there to serve as a reminder for what works and what doesn’t. History should be used to guide us towards improvement, not as a way to hold us back. We must acknowledge every achievement with the failures that got us there, and make a promise to ourselves to never make those mistakes again.

But people are flawed, and sometimes the eyewitness accounts even of people there to see a crucial part of history cannot be trusted. So what next? That’s why something like archaeology is an underrated and important art form. It studies humans through history not by the words they say, which cant be help as gospel, but by the things they left behind. The material forms they used. Plenty has been learned about many periods of history by studying pots and pans, contraptions and currency of the time period, and seeing how those things were used.

So I do pledge to ensure that true archaeologists are considered as part of the national budget, before we lose the artform to more stereotypically viable professions. But there is a catch – I only pledge to fund true archaeologists, not Lara Croft wannabes.

There are some that do not wish to be the forbearer of future knowledge. Some that don’t wish to enlighten the children of future generations. There are some that are content to play the part and take the trinkets and it is for that reason Voynich that you specifically will be exempt from my funding pledge.

You steamed into OSW like a second-rate Tomb raider, looking to add to the collection of valuable antiques left behind from parents. The glamour of the dig interests you more than academic pursuit. I’m warning you though, Voynich. You shouldn’t dig too deep with me. You raid my tomb and you will feel the ramifications.  You don’t want to be left in my tomb because if you do you’ll regret it. Any knowledge you gain from raiding me will be paid back in kind, I can promise you this. You must have some scary skeletons in your closet, so trust me when I tell you I’ll raid your tomb with more gusto than Lara Craft and Indiana Jones combined. And if you push me too far, you will not just feel the ramifications in working areas, you will be entombed.

And what use is an Archaeologist who is trapped in the tombs he professes to have raided anyway? Like a fireman trapped inside the burning building he was sworn to protect, eventually the flames will engulf you, and the fire will rage on.

So take heed, America, and do not trust the man who claims to be an archaeologist trying to solve the mysteries of the past, when all he is really doing is adding to the mysteries of the future.

Vote instead for someone who knows their own history. Vote Whitlock.