THE IMPOSTOR IMMOBILISATION

Call me Joker, because Redwing you’re as close to Batman as I’ve ever seen.

I can see in you the things I saw in him once – a youthful fervour, a clamour to clean up the world that did you wrong. Your family, like Bruce’s, have been killed sooner than you would have liked. And much like Batman dove head-first into superhero-dom, so have you.

Like Batman, you consider yourself to be the vessel for justice in this world, and like Batman you fight with every fibre in your being to achieve those aims. That is somewhat respectable. A superhero without 100% commitment is not a very effective hero. Trust me, I speak from experience.

Like Batman, you’ve found yourself some indomitable foes to lock horns with. Me and the Doc, we’re like The Joker with two heads. He’s the crazy that you balance out, and I’m the similarities that define us. Our destinies were changed by a single day – you by the loss of your wife and child, and me by one traumatic day that really, I don’t want to get into here. But trust me, it was bad.

We both like to dress up in masks and spandex and fight people. That’s a little crazy in and of itself, don’t you think? Who decided that spandex was the material of choice in our world? They’re the ones who deserve the real punishment.

But mostly, just like Batman needs the Joker, you NEED me and the Doc. We complete you. Without us, your life has no purpose. We are the evil you want to extinguish. We’re the negative you want to nullify. But Redwing, that just isn’t happening.

For all your similarities to Batman, there are some glaring differences. In fact, they are so glaring I’d be better calling them DEFICIENCIES.

Firstly, Batman was bankrolled by insane wealth generated by Wayne Enterprises and his delightful double life as businessman extraordinaire. And as impressive as you’ve been in trying to emulate that, that is all it is – an emulation. You don’t have a multibillion-dollar corporation behind you because me and Doc would have been long snuffed out if you did.

Secondly – and here is the real kicker: alongside his great piles of money, Batman is a physical specimen of a man. Now I don’t mean that in the “I want to date him” kind of way, but simply this: Bruce Wayne trained himself for years to reach prime physical fitness. He is in peak condition.

You are not.

You’re a comic book geek who figured out where the gym was a couple of years ago. And again, commendable though your effort is? Well it just falls short in comparison to the Bat guy.

I don’t need to find some big scheme to bring you down, Redwing. Your power is simply the heart you show in trying to be the hero you think people need. And when you lose this week, you will be heartbroken. We will break your heart and break your spirit, and then you will just be a comic book geek who once had a dream.